JOKELORD: A man who can do shopping before the shopping centre opens and a face that is a back-face...Argghh!!



TGIF!! NOW LET'S DO THE JOKELORD FOR FRIDAY!

Christmas has to be a warm, well organised, caring, considerate, social occasion. So, it's unlikely that a man could take responsibility for making it happen.

For starters, the vast majority of men don't even think about Christmas until Christmas Eve. And when they do eventually rush into the high street at the latest possible moment, they seem genuinely surprised to discover that the only options remaining on the shelves are cheap perfume and lingerie suitable for high class tarts.

Let's face it, Santa Claus must be a woman. If Santa was a man, all there would be under the Christmas tree are high tech' toys .... still in the original wrappings, of course.

Another flaw in the 'he-Santa' argument is his apparent ability to arrive promptly every Christmas Eve. If Santa was a man, he could be relied upon to have transportation problems, get lost in all the snow and clouds and flatly refuse to ask anyone for directions.

There are lots of other reasons why Santa can't be a man:

Men have no idea about packing bags.

Men would rather be dead than wear red velvet.

Men have no interest in stockings, unless they are being worn by an attractive female.

But, the real show-stopper is, most men simply can't do commitment.

 

AN EXTRA JOKE FOR YOUR HUMOUROUS DELIGHT

It was just before Christmas and the magistrate was in a happy mood. He asked the prisoner who was in the dock, 'What are you charged with?'

The prisoner replied, 'Doing my Christmas shopping too early.'

'That's no crime', said the magistrate. 'Just how early were you doing this shopping?'

'Before the shop opened', answered the prisoner.

FUNNY PICTURE OF THE DAY

 

FUNNY FACE OF THE DAY




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